Primitive screw dating

A piece of furniture made from uniformly thick wood is not a hand made piece no matter what form it takes and no matter what kind of distressing it displays.

If the wood is exactly 3/4" thick, the wood was probably bought at 84 lumber and distressed to make it look old.

Most handmade pieces will show some irregularities to the surface such as minor nicks indicative of a hand plane being used to smooth out the wood, and this is sometimes even more evident on the back than on the finished front surfaces.

Most machine made pieces date after 1860, according to art historian Lori Verderame (also known as Dr.

But remember that if it is less than 3/4" thick, it could have been bought at Grossman's and then planed to thin it and give it the textured feel of old wood. Another area to watch out for is hand smithied tools.

Smaller “matching” elements, such as wooden drawer knobs, chair spindles, or feet on a variety of objects, may have slight differences in the shape if they were hand crafted prior to 1860 or so.

Machine made furniture produced largely after 1860 will have components that match more perfectly than those made by hand. It’s almost impossible to make the same exact furniture element over and over identically without the use of machinery.

When hand planes were used to smooth woods, they more often than not left some sort of uneven surface.

Dating is at best another extracurricular, number six or number seven down the list, somewhere between Model UN and intramural badminton.

I've been co-hosting young alumni events for name-brand schools for long enough to know that these kids come out a little lopsided (which sounds so much better than "socially awkward," don't you think? All they need is a little tune up, or a little dating textbook like The Tao of Dating for Women or The Tao of Dating for Men, to get them going -- plus a little practice.