Why did you choose your adoptive child

Service portal Baden-Wuerttemberg

When you put a child up for adoption, you are irrevocably giving up all rights and responsibilities as a parent. Before you make such an important decision, you should think it over very carefully and seek extensive advice.

Consulting and mediation
Doctors, social workers, youth welfare offices or advice centers in independent and municipal sponsorship can show you perspectives for a life with a child. They provide you with detailed information about various support offers. If adoption has turned out to be the right alternative for you from such discussions, you should then seek detailed advice from an adoption agency.
If, after consulting an adoption agency, you are sure that you want to put your child up for adoption, ask them to look for adoptive parents. You can actively help shape the process and choose between open, half-open or incognito adoption.
Regardless of whether you want to get to know the adoptive parents personally or maintain written contact, you can influence the selection of applicants. You can also specify, for example, the religious beliefs in which your child should be brought up.

Adoptive guardianship
Once the adoption agency has found suitable parents for your child, the child comes to the adoptive parents with your consent. Then one speaks of an "adoptive guardianship".

Declaration of consent
You only have to sign a declaration of consent with a notary when you finally decide to release it. Your consent will then be notarized. As a rule, the notary submits the declaration of consent to the family court. As soon as this consent has been received by the family court and becomes effective, your parental custody and access rights are suspended. The child's legal representation then usually lies with the youth welfare office. After the parental consent has been received by the family court, this decision cannot be reversed. When you put your child up for adoption, all of your rights and obligations cease to exist. Your child is no longer legally related to you.

You can put your child up for adoption at any time, but no earlier than eight weeks after the birth. There are no time restrictions later that you need to be aware of. It is important that both parents agree to the release. This also applies in the event that one of the parents is a minor. If the father is unknown, the mother's explanation is sufficient.
The consent of a parent can be replaced by the family court under certain strict conditions.This is the case, for example, if the parent has persistently and grossly violated his obligations towards the child or his behavior towards the child has shown that he is indifferent to the child and if that Failure to adopt would be disproportionate to the child.

In addition to the consent of the parents, the consent of the child is required. A child over 14 years of age must consent to the adoption themselves. The legal representative must agree to this consent. Only the legal representative can give consent for a child under 14 years of age. The declaration of consent of the child or the legal representative also requires notarial certification.
Tip: In the case of the adoption of stepchildren and relatives, you can also submit the declaration without prior consultation with the adoption agency, as the adoptive parents have already been determined.

Formal determination of adoption
The adoption itself becomes legally effective and final as soon as the family court has formally determined it and the decision has been served on the adoptive person.

Adoption secrecy
When the child is 16 years old at the latest, the child may search for his birth parents without the consent of the adoptive parents and request access to files at the adoption agency. For this purpose, you can leave letters or photos for your child there. However, if you have decided to refuse to be contacted at a later date, you can inform the adoption agency of this.

Note: Adoptive parents are not obliged to inform the child about the adoption. However, the staff at the adoption agency urgently recommend that parents talk to their child about it as early as possible.

Tip: You can always contact your adoption agency with any questions. There you can also get addresses of self-help groups of relinquishing parents on request.